am i the main character?

nope not really

As an avid coming-of-age film enjoyer, I have watched many characters walk down the street with an indie rock song accompanying them. They are filled with vigor for life, and will overcome challenges with the grit that comes with growing up. There’s something particularly poignant about being this type of “main character”, one that I believe has affected teenagers and young adults the most. It means defining your life. Life is a performance in itself. Society serves as our audience and culture as the definer. We assume various roles, conform to societal expectations, and continuously adapt our “performance” to different settings.

Excuse my cliché, but everyone is technically the hero of their own story. Of everyone, you understand yourself and your complexities better than anyone. But there’s a fine line between acknowledging your importance to yourself and your importance to others. It’s not that your character is unimportant, but understanding the role you play in others’ lives is crucial.

Your life as a whole is one huge story, and you have control of how it’s metaphorically written. I’m not really a rebellious child, or very spontaneous at that, but the idea that the life I’m living now is the only teenage years I will get inspires me to do more. 

A few summers ago, my sister and I were standing outside the pool in our backyard. It was night, and probably not suitable swimming weather. I confirmed this by dipping my foot in, and it was positively frigid. But let’s go in, and we grab a floatie and go in with our shorts and tank tops. I tell her that we’ll remember this, and she tells me that she doubts it. The whole “swimming” endeavor was only about three minutes at best, but I will always remember trying to stay afloat and not fall into the cold water while we were in all our clothes. It’s the kind of silly story that will define my youth, despite not being super exciting. A plain summer night has now become engrained in my mind, mundane became memory.

from pinterest

Recently, a term has surfaced on social media called “main character syndrome”. It’s not an actual syndrome, but more so used to describe narcissistic and self-centered individuals who consider themselves stars. They think they are the most important people in any conversation or situation. They may find themselves doing attention-seeking behaviors or having an inflated sense of self. Others will appear as secondary characters, and hence, less important. 

But what can we learn from being a main character? It’s not all necessarily bad. Obstacles aren’t as limiting when you consider how they further your development. The outlook forces you to look at your mundane as significant. I remember the time I was walking in the library, which I frequent so it wasn’t that special of a moment. But I had There She Goes by The La’s through my earphones, which made it seem much more special.

I believe everyone should be the main character, and remember that the roles they play in their own lives are not necessarily those in others. Live life as a story, and strive for memories that you’ll be proud of.

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A list of songs I would walk down the street to in an intro of a hypothetical film starring me:

Judy and the Dream of Horses: Belle and Sebastian

Growing Up: The Linda Lindas

All In White: The Vaccines

Fire & Fury: The Overcoats

Wreckin Bar (Ra Ra Ra): The Vaccines

Wrapped Up In Books: Belle and Sebastian

San Francisco: Foxygen